Saturday, April 24, 2010

In My Imagination

Summer heat and night shifts are the perfect catalysts for imagination.

I was all excited to sleep after my night shift, but because summer heat is a bitch and campaign jingle noise is bullshit, I found myself unable to sleep in my rented room even if I counted a million sheep. Home sweet airconditioned home is a hundred and fifty bucks away, so instead of taking a cab and sleeping at home before night duty as a normal non-cheapskate person would do, I forgo sleep, go online, let myself be inspired by awesome blogger Helga's recent post and start imagining my perfect world where:
  1. Summer heat and night shifts are but distant memories.
  2. I have clear skin, regular monthly visits and a metabolism that would keep me barbie-thin for the rest of my life no matter what I eat.
  3. Every person has a signature fart smell and mine would be green clover and aloe.
  4. I am an events organizer who gets to go to various product launches and food tasting events.
  5. My mom and dad never age. My sister is my bff and my brother is an international singing sensation.
  6. I have a best selling book, which will be made into a movie. The movie will star Johnny Depp, Tom Hanks, Patrick Dempsey and Geoff Eigenmann. Geoff would not be allowed to talk in the movie, only smile.
  7. My boyfriend is a mean race car driver and professional gamer.
  8. I have a steady supply of gourmet potato chips, macadamia nuts, my favorite chocolates, french fries and hello panda.
  9. The world believes in God and is cancer free.
  10. I speak fluent English, Filipino, French, Spanish, Italian, German, Chinese and Japanese. Learning all these languages would be via hypnotism or something totally effortless like that.
  11. Cockroaches are extinct. There would be a cockroach museum where people can throw tomatoes at cockroach monuments and laugh at the nonexistence of the cockroach species.
  12. I have 20/20 vision and I can adjust the color of my eyes according to my outfit.
  13. I have the cutest dog with a huge pink bow who poops at her designated poop compartment in the house.
  14. I travel via apparating and Paris is less than 10 seconds away.
  15. Awesome things I imagine [such as things mentioned in this list] become a reality.
It's 4pm, I haven't slept yet and my next shift starts at 9pm. I want milk, cookies, sleep and something that would halt the catalysts that are bringing about all this imagination.

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